Congratulations on your engagement and your desire to prepare for the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony! Indeed, this is the joy of the Church as you since marriage is a sign of God’s love. We at St Martin of Tours are honored to journey with you as you prepare exchange your vows.

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GENERAL GUIDELINES

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• Please state whether you are seeking marriage for the first time or whether you seek to have your civil marriage convalidated.

• At least one of the couple must be a baptized Catholic.

• Both parties must be “free to marry” in the Catholic Church.

• If you were married before, then prior marriage must be addressed before you schedule a date for marriage.

• Before you schedule marriage date and reception plans, it is important to contact the parish and talk with a priest. Marriage preparation takes at least 9 months. The priest will assign you a mentor couple and give you a list of requirements. Once the marriage preparation begins, you will meet the Wedding Coordinator to schedule the dates for your rehearsal and wedding.

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SIGNED MARRIAGE GUIDELINES ACCEPTANCE AGREEMENT

 

The couple agrees to comply with Marriage guidelines at St. Martin of Tours. To reserve a date, you must pay a non-refundable deposit of $300. Couples being prepared outside our parish must also submit the following documents:

 

• Pastoral Care Form: This form is signed by the priest, deacon or lay wedding minister who has agreed to prepare you for marriage and complete your marriage paperwork. This form must be submitted as soon as the marriage preparation begins.

• Visiting Clergy Agreement: A priest or deacon from outside the parish who has agreed to preside your wedding must sign this form. He must also have faculties to celebrate marriages.

DIOCESAN MARRIAGE PREPARATION PROGRAM

 

Marriage Preparation in the Diocese of San Diego consists of one or more of the following:

 

• FOCCUS Inventory: The FOCCUS (Facilitating Open Couple Communication Understanding and Study) Inventory is a questionnaire that targets areas important to marital success. The report generated at the conclusion of the questionnaire is used to focus communication on topics warranting further attention. Whoever prepares you for marriage will set this up for you. A REFOCCUS inventory is available to couples who have been civilly married for at least a few years.

• Witness to Love: The Diocese of San Diego recommends the Witness to Love program, which allows engaged couples to choose a married couple or “mentor couple” that they are inspired by and see as a source of faith formation. The mentor couple is typically the parish but can be any couple that meets the Witness to Love program requirements. With the assistance of a trained “coach couple”, the mentor couple will support, encourage, and pray for the engaged couple throughout the preparation process as well as meet with them to go through the Witness to Love curriculum. For more information, please visit witnesstolove.org.

• Celebrating Your Love: Diocesan Day Retreat - Celebrating Your Love is a one-day retreat held on Saturdays at locations throughout the Diocese. The program presents a summary of Catholic teaching on marriage and an overview of practical and valuable skills essential for marriage. For more information, visit sdcatholic.org/cyl

• Engaged Encounter Weekend: This weekend retreat provides engaged couples valuable space and time to explore the depth of marriage. Through personal sharing and Catholic theology, the weekend challenges couples. They explore essential topics such as communication, understanding “love” as a decision, true intimacy, forgiveness, and living as a sacrament to build a strong marriage foundation. For more information, go to engagedencountersd.org

• Marriage Encounter Weekend: The Marriage Encounter Weekend is similar to Engaged Encounter, but for couples who have already been civilly married for more than a few years. For more information, visit wwwme-sandiego.org  

• Introduction To Natural Family Planning: this is a session where the Church’s teaching on married love and responsible parenthood is examined.

​REQUIRED DOCUMENTS

 

The following documents are required for church records:

 

• Baptismal certificates for bride and groom: These must be original copies issued from the church of Baptism no earlier than six months prior to the marriage.

• Statement of Freedom to Marry: When the couple is not personally known to the priest or deacon these forms state that neither the bride nor the groom has been married before. The forms are available at the parish office and must be signed by a relative in the presence of either a priest, deacon, or notary public.

• Marriage license: Obtain your marriage license at least one month before the wedding. If you are already civilly married, we will need a copy of your marriage certificate.

​WEDDING DATES AND TIME  

Weddings are celebrated on Saturdays afternoons or during a weekday evening. We do not celebrate weddings on Sundays. Rehearsals are held a day before a wedding is celebrated. The Wedding Coordinator will do the rehearsals and members of the wedding party should be present.  Guidelines about what music to play will be provided by the Wedding Coordinator during your first meeting with her. The Wedding Coordinator will provide the couple with information of the parish musicians at least a month before the wedding so that they can plan well for the ceremony. The parish charges $700 if our parish musicians provide the music or $400 if you do not need the music. Outside musicians will only provide the music with the permission from the pastor and coordination from our parish Music director.